The specialists I have to see are slated for the 28th and the 31st of this month (July) respectively. These two moments in time will be the bellwethers of change. The nature of the change remains indeterminate in both cases, but I know that there will be a blessing in all of this no matter what. Don't ask how or why... I can only say that I just know. Meanwhile, Bartowsky continues to edit the vast amounts of footage we shot on this trip. He has no idea how simple his life is right now. And I have no idea how complex it truly is. We all wrestle with our demons. Usually alone. I with mine. Bartowsky with his. Today, at 4:30-something in the morning, my spidey-sense is kicking in and I sense other changes coming. So much so that I have already moved towards the moment I suspect is on the horizon. What movements have I made? What is it that I suspect? Let's just say that if I am correct in my assessment, it will change the nature of my days. I should know more within the next 24 to 72 hours. At the end of it all, right or wrong, it is what it is. And "it" will shift and become whatever is in front, and sometimes behind, a person. Either way, there is a small hint of futility left upon the tongue when anyone spends more time wondering about probable outcomes than when one takes action. When one wonders instead of merely accepts the outcome. But the same residue is sometimes also left behind in the wake of action. What am I saying?
I guess that I am saying what will be will be. However, we can either try to prepare somewhat for suspected events, which I have done, or one can worry and wonder. In both cases I sense the gyrations of body and/or mind that hint at futility. But of the two choices, I would rather opt for action. I am am so glad that I took this trip with Buddy Bartowsky when I did. Like our trip, the horizons in my personal life are starting to blur. Stay tuned.
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